It's never too late to bloom.

Rediscovering my creative self through Burnout

Is there a passion, hobby or interest that you have that you had at a younger age that you lost touch with?

At different points in our lives, many of us may choose to explore new experiences by setting aside certain aspects of our personalities. We may temporarily pause our passions in order to pursue other interests, some of which may be short-lived, while others ignite a sense of joy within us that never fully extinguishes.

Unfortunately, the busyness of life can cause us to lose touch with our playful, creative side, making it difficult to reignite that spark.

I believe part of the journey from Burnout is rediscovering who we are.

This month I wanted to share that it's never too late to reconnect with that thing that lights you up. I’ve also included a hand-drawn mindful colouring sheet for you to download.

When we are Burned out, the deep exhaustion we feel often leaves us with a sense of disconnection from ourselves and our true nature. We are often in survival mode, just getting through each day. When we are in that stage, it is near impossible to remember who we are at the core. Our authentic self is lost in a cycle of tired and wired.

I wanted to share my own story about how important it is to take care of ourselves and embrace our true selves before we get overwhelmed by stress and exhaustion. From my own experience, I realised that setbacks can actually help us rediscover our passions and bring out our creative and fun side.

In the early days of recovering from Burnout, I was unable to run my business; I was unwell with debilitating fatigue and brain fog.

Even though I was so ill, I'd constantly beat myself up, feeling like a failure and giving myself self-care felt like I was lazy and selfish. So I'd try doing something 'productive' only to crash with exhaustion.

It was only when I started on a recovery programme for fatigue-related illnesses I understood how important it was to give myself permission to do an activity of self-care and self-love.

In order to recover, I had to do something that calmed and relaxed my nervous system; this needed to be enjoyable and an activity that didn't involve screens!

At first, switching off from everything was hard; I felt lazy and needed to 'get on' and ‘get back’ to real life.

But the research was clear I needed to try something different than push myself harder to get well. So I began to look for activities I previously enjoyed that were easy, fun and creative.

It was important for me to let go of feeling guilty about not being productive and focus on giving my body the rest and care it needed to heal properly.

I stumbled upon an old mindfulness colouring book that was gifted to me, and I’d initially dismissed it as 'not my ‘thing. Picking it up, I decided, ‘Why not give it a go!' I dug out some coloured pencils from my ancient art supplies.

I couldn't believe the pleasure I found in using colour to transform the black-and-white line drawings into lively patterns and images that gave me joy.

Sitting at the kitchen table with my favourite music on, I felt my active mind slowing down, and things became clearer as I relaxed into the process of colouring precisely within the lines and finding ease and calm in the moment.

However, as I began to enjoy my newfound passion for colouring, it soon became a bittersweet experience. After a time, the repetitive movement of colouring with pencils started to cause me pain and fatigue in my hand, so eventually, I couldn't continue to colour as I didn't have the strength to hold the pencil.

I felt heartbroken as it was like another thing taken away from me due to the side effects of my Burnout. But because it was an activity that brightened my day, I couldn't give up, so I found a workaround.

Writing this now, the challenges I had over a simple self-care activity such as colouring seem unreal. But it reminds me of how far I've come on this journey.

In the end, I bought some lovely professional paintbrush pens that were less intense to use than colouring pencils, and they glided effortlessly across the paper. I enjoyed the bold, bright effects I could create. It felt fun and like returning to childhood.

I continued for a long while experimenting with different styles of mindfulness colouring books. The most relaxing were mandalas. I loved the symbolism and meaning behind them. I also enjoyed creating colour palettes and finding ways to make the patterns dance.

After many months of mindfulness colouring, I needed a new challenge. It dawned on me that simply doing ‘mindful colouring' no longer fuelled my newfound creative spirit. I had the urge to be creating my own artwork that reflected my style and personality.

You see, I studied interior textile design at university and landed my first job as a designer after graduation in London, designing carpets for luxurious homes. This was all done traditionally by hand using coloured pencils.

Yes, it was like mindfulness colouring and getting paid for it!

I realise now what a magical time it was working in a studio with a team of creatives, including flooring designers, architects, and interior designers. I can't believe how lucky I was, but being so young, I just thought that was the norm.

When I was strong enough, I decided to try drawing my own mandalas, a traditional mindfulness practice I felt would get me to create my own art whilst also being a restorative practice.

I bought a lovely Moleskin sketchbook and some finalisers and began to draw. Although mandalas were fun and relaxing, they only kept my interest for a short time; they didn't create the spark I longed for.

Last spring, I finally found the inspiration I had been searching for while walking my dog among flowering blossoms. Being surrounded by nature uplifted me, and I started taking numerous photos, creating artwork, and sharing them on Instagram.

While playing around with some photos, I had a sudden urge to try drawing a flower. However, being a perfectionist, I was worried that my drawing skills may have left me over time. It had been over two decades since I last drew florals while working in a carpet design studio, and my initial attempts were far from impressive!

I nearly gave up as I felt I'd lost my talent for drawing, but as I continued, I gained confidence. It took many weeks to be brave enough to push through my self-doubt and keep going until something I liked appeared on the paper.

Soon my confidence began to return, and I could see that I'd unlocked a part of myself that had been laying dormant as a volcano, ready to erupt with creations led by my soul.

Rediscovering our passions and or purpose after a setback such as illness can be a slow process, but I have seen it many times; the one thing that we get from being forced to stop and reassess our lives is that we find our way back home to ourselves.

I am now reconnected to the creative part of myself I'd put away for a long while, and I am not putting it back in a box. Moving forward, I am excited to add creativity to my business while still enjoying the process. I look forward to sharing more with you when my online mindfulness shop "DawnedUpon Calm Studio' launches later this year.

Reminder: No matter what your passion is, there is always time to reclaim it. There is always time to BLOOM.

Free Download: Here is a link to my colouring sheet. It’s hand-drawn and ready to download, so you can enjoy some calm and creative mindfulness. I’d love to know how you get on and or see what you create.

Colouring Sheet Bloom

1.76MB ∙ PDF file

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Original Hand Drawn Modern Floral Colouring Sheet. For personal use only. Copyright DawnedUpon Calm Studio

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Journal Prompt: Is there a hidden talent, passion or interest you've got that is waiting to be reignited, a fire that went out in the busyness of life that is waiting to emerge again?

Go Gently

Dawn xo